FCN Online People Poll
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January 14, 2000 Anger management seminars for perpetrators. Self-esteem building training for perpetrators and victims. Exercises and training that promote self-healing through self-knowledge. Spiritual guidance to the development of one's true spirit and the evolving on one's soul. Alliance with the Mighty Omnipotent Spirit that rules the Universe in truth and in light. Shirlene M. Pryor January 14, 2000 Domestic violence is a direct result of man turning his back on God and a society that has lost moral direction and ethical judgment. When a society compromises the principles of family and set up false models, thus, the symptoms are always inward destruction and social maladjustment. Violence is glamorized in every sector of society and this system wants us now to believe, that they are clueless to the true cause and effect of such negative propagation. However, this does not excuse us from taking personal responsibility for our conduct and behavior. It must be mandated in every church, temple, synagogue, mosque, masjid and houses of African centered cultural institution where as classes must be set up to offer our people life coping skills and anger management direction. It is very hypocritical to present O.J Simpson and Jim Brown as poster boys for domestic violence and not truly deal with the issue, other than offering Black men a jail cell. Incarceration is not a solution to solving the domestic violence epidemic, but it will require a social, economic and political solution. This is the challenge that face our behavioral scientists and spiritual leadership. Lastly, must reject these reactionary and white feminist led domestic violence models that do not speak for us, but for the status quo. We must get back to God, who is love and permit him to assist us at this time of need. Fahim Knight January 14, 2000 Society needs to stop blaming the victim of domestic violence and place the blame squarely where it belongs, with the abuser. Instead of asking the victim, "Why do you stay?" ask the abuser, "Why do you beat her/him." Also emphasis needs to be placed on educating men and women, especially when they are young; i.e., the many forms abuse takes, and how to be able to tell if a potential mate is predisposed to becoming a batterer. Maria Ceasar January 14, 2000 Greetings, and Peace be upon you, Domestic violence begins with a thought that is contrary to the thoughts of the One true living God. Almighty God (Jesus, the name of the Spirit in the body of the man Jesus) teaches us in Ephesians 5:28,29-that men ought to love their wives as their own bodies...he that loveth his wife loveth himself...no man ever yet hated his own flesh, but nourisheth and cherisheth it... Proper and right teachings of God is the only way to solve all problems. Peace be unto you. To learn about Gods' way of Holiness e-mail me. Brother Davis, January 14, 2000 The best deterrent to domestic violence is education. Far too many young males and females grow up believing that a woman is a mere appendage to a man. I've met entirely too many young men and women who view women as something less than human. All parents should be vigilant about not perpetuating sexist behavior. At the same time we need to be careful that we don't reinforce the idea that equality of the sexes means that a woman should not be respected because she is a woman. Unfortunately many people (male and female) believe that "equal" means "identical".--It does not! Until we educate our children that violence is only acceptable if used in self-defense, we will continue to see excessive numbers of battered women and battered men! If we start educating the very young now, maybe we can stem the tide of future domestic violence. Leslye Allen January 14, 2000 Brothers and sisters need to learn better ways to resolve conflicts. Verbal abuse is just as bad as physical abuse. The pattern is like this.. men beat women and the women beat the children. All areas of family life need to be reexamined. Karen Owes January 15, 2000 As Salaam Alaikum, First, one must have faith, and believe, in Allah (God). We must put Allah (God) at the center of everything we do. It is Allah that provides all that we have, and, if we turn to him in our times of need, he will assist us in our troubles. Second, we must act on the principles and teachings that Allah has given to us through his many prophets and messengers. The Honorable Elijah Muhammad teaches us that "mere belief accounts for nothing unless carried into practice." The Holy Qur'an says that Allah changes not the condition of a people until they first change themselves. So, we must become more than lip professors. We must act on what we have learned and what we say that we believe. Lastly, I urge all those that indulge in the
sickness of domestic violence to listen to the Honorable Louis Farrakhan.
Please, listen to him and act on what he says before it is too late. I'm not
just saying this to support my minister, but I know, personally, the affects
that domestic violence can have on people. I grew in a home where beating
the hell out of my mother was the order of the day. As a result, she turned
to drug abuse, and stealing to support her habit. Aside from that, my older
brother and I began to harbor feelings of hate towards my stepfather. We
even, at times, talked about and planned on taking his life when we got
older in age. So, to those of you who choose to beat your women, I ask you
one simple question. How will you feel when your children stop looking up to
you with joy and love, and start looking down on you, with hate and
resentment, from the barrel of a gun? Again, I implore you, make Allah (God)
the center of your relationship. It can save your life. Ash-Shaheed Muhammad January 16, 2000 As Salaam Alaikum! I think that a woman must have a plan A, B, C and D before getting married. It is true that you do know know a person until you live with them, therefore if he/she want to act a fool you can move on with no problem because you have prepared yourself for that day. Women or men need to have their own savings so it can help with the cost of moving. Also you can always pick up a phone and call the police. If the act like a beast then on get the beast on them. As Salaam Alaikum! Elizabeth Muhammad January 17, 2000 The way to do it is to simply get out of it. Aleasia Grims January 17, 2000 The whole purpose of (Willie Lynch) should be closely examined. We should understand why he was put in position to separate us from the inside out. Isaac M Clayton January 17, 2000 To solve a problem such as domestic violence, we must begin with breaking the cycle. What I mean by that is that if a child is exposed to such violence, he or she will accept that behavior as being reasonable. By breaking the cycle, we can begin by educating the young that you do not abuse that which you claim to love. If you love a man or a woman you treat them with love & respect, once you have that the violence will end. Olin A. Osborne, Jr January 17, 2000 I think one of the solutions of domestic violence is education with teaching of love for oneself. When a man beats a woman be it verbally or physically I think he is not loving himself. He is insecure and possibly has no control over his temper. If that man loved who he is and I am specifically speaking about a black man he would not feel the need to degrade a woman to get his point across. I also believe that domestic abuse is a learned behavior. If a son or daughter saw momma or daddy get beat they learn that is acceptable behavior and begin to repeat the cycle themselves be it being the abuser or the person accepting the abuse. I wish we could go into all the homes and teach a man how to treat a woman. Teach him who he is a a black man and what the purpose of a woman here on this earth is about. I think we need to start with the children. Let them know what is wrong or right in a marriage/relationship and that would at least stop the cycle. Dorisha January 17, 2000 There needs to be an examination of the roles of men and women in relationships to develop a sense of balance and unity. Men and women must learn to pull together when dealing with the challenges they are faced with rather than tearing each other apart. Men must also challenge negative and destructive beliefs which support their use of violence as method of solving disputes at home and in the community. Men should take responsibility for their violence and make positive steps to change. Women should seek assistance and express their frustrations in a safe environment free from the judgments of others who may not understand what she has been through. Domestic violence is based on centuries of racist and sexist rhetoric therefore it will not be solved overnight. Marvin Muhammad 
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